Baby, don't talk...

After the syndrome... I learned quite well how to stand on my own two feet and find my own game and my own pawns of what was left of my college career. That's right, I had my own fun with my data collecting.

I was now a senior in college, which meant I could of been stressing on interviewing with companies looking to hire a brilliant college graduate like myself, or I could be checking out the younger classmen stock.

(hey women can multi-task)

He said he had a "girlfriend", never understood those fools who had girlfriends living hundreds of miles away, while in college, while prime pussy was being thrown at them. I would soon later find out why this worked for him...

I like my fun but I do not like drama or hurting people, so I kept my contact to flirting and smiles when in passing with him. Come to think of it I dont even think I fantacized about him.
Wow, good girl, me.

I mean lets be real,I didn't know yet that some of the most epic sexual moments in history are usually...when....ummmm... they are with people who have other partners.... but see I didnt know that yet. And yes I am going to hell.

And for those of you who think I am terrible now... just don't do it! Dont have affairs or cheat....but for those of you who have...you know what Im talking about...that wrong, spontaneous, sneaky act is irresistible.

I digress. I was sick of my on again off again main dude and throughly enjoying being eyed and checked out by the younger dudes. This one was cute, lots of positive energy, enthusiasm, and naturally a football player. I could eat him for dinner.

There were the usual suspects as the usual weak frat college party doing the usual grind...and word out on the street is young cute one was now single? hmmmmmmm.

Newly freed into the wild. I took it upon myself and my pussy to remind him of what it was like and the reaping rewards.

I'm sorry to say I have blocked out many memories of college for many valid reasons as you can tell if you have read this blog... so bare with me. And I dont feel like calling up one of my girls and asking her how it all went down... but here we go...

I end up walking back to Cute Boys dorm room.

Dorm?

WTF.

This is like a breaking and entering crime scene when you are a senior in college, walking, by choice, with freshmen and sophomore boys, boys mostlikely wearing their football jerseys from the victory game they played that day...boys who may live in the only "male only jock dorm". I am a ho for the night, and dont care. Im in control. Im doing some community service. Cutie wants to kick it.

We walk in like pack, we are all going to...guess? Smoke the bob marley ... get high.

If I need to get high to makeout with someone, its not a good sign! More on that later. Lots of that.

So I'm in his dorm room, with all his hommies, a few come in and out just to scope the scene. They peep their head in like roosters (as I hear low voiced whispers of my name down the hall and I think no one believes that a female senior was in Cutie's room getting high!). Ha.

I smile, nod, and wave.

We are all chillin, smoking, and of course analyzing music. A few boys have the brain cells to start to trickle off, and leave us alone. We are looking up tunes and and comparing music taste.I am somewhatenjoying myself. This is mental foreplayfor me.He is sweet, complimenting me, likes goodmusic. He mayget a blow job. (its not always that easy... remember this was college).

So Imhappy.

So, he decides he wants to sing a song for me.

OK OK OKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK

A song, a live, song?

A song sung by a man, with an amazing voice can be heavenly and breathtaking. Especially if you are in church. But a song sung by anyone, just cause, its just goofy. Leave it for the shower boys. I mean I get the whole fun, drunk,karaoke obsession, but thats different. A love ballad impromptu?

I play along, cuz thats what we do.

And he sings

And is no musiq soulchild.

I lie thru my teeth and tell him he should def. sing for the upcoming talent show (wait am I in high school or college? college. hmmm.)

Funny thing is. Well, I will tell you later.

So next, I probably did the massage his shoulder rub down and went for his scalp and temples-trickey of mine. That always always puts them into a coma like putty in your hands. A trickey that i always enjoy, i love making men exhale and relax.

One thing leads to another (thank god!) and we are making out and I am topless. And I am on his bottom bedbunk. It's going well.

I am pretending I am a freshman in college and making out with one of the star football players. Gooooo me! This is girl language for head hen! (but im not a freshman).

We kiss and kiss and wait is this high school?

He wants to talk.

I dont.

I start kissing him again ... he stops and asks me about where I grew up...we kiss and he asks me about the game he played in that day and if i saw his play during the 3rd quarter.... we kiss and he asks me what its like to be a senior in college...we kiss and he asks and we kiss and he asks...this boy has a question for everything and my answers go like this:

its cool
thats cool
ummm hmmm
really?
its cool

and usually start nibbling his ear, neck, or yumyum grabbing those biceps to get him back on point. I take his shirt off and am easing my way down south, I dont just go straight for the goods, I ease east and west and north and south and keep him guessing.Its going well.

Im really enjoying myself, and he isnt asking questions or talking anymore.

I unbuckle his pants.... he unbuckles his everythought!

He wants to talk more!

About his ex girlfriend.

I cuddle up to him like a lapcat and listen to him exaplain how 24 hours ago he was in a relationship. And how he thinks "im really cool" and he is so glad he is single.Within 30 seconds he is doing a 180 now and saying that "maybe he shouldnt of broken up with her" and then it starts to sound like maybe she broke up with him. Diaarhea of the mouth. Lucky me. I am now a mommy.

and mommy doesnt want to sit here
playing counselor
in your dorm room
topless
high as a kite
thats not what i came here for

I realize I might as well give some good karma and listen to him and stroke his ego and remind him of his youth and how many fishes their are in sea...we know the drill of break-up cliche's. Too bad they are always true.

"It takes time".
"When one door closes,another one opens"
"He/She wasn't good enough for you"

blah blah blah blah blah blah blah (its all true!)

I must have said something right
because now he was taking off my pants

thank you! I am not going to hell!
we are back in business!

strangely enough. i wasnt turned on. and young as he was i wasnt in the mood after all this build up to have a trouble shooting potentially high risk of bad downtwon teaching experience....i.e. teaching him about my clitoris.

so i got back on top of him and continued what i started before his every emotional tought show and tell. I unbuckled his pants completely, they were baggy of course
it was dark, by now I usually could locate a hard package of some sort whispering to me to come visit? Strange. So I used my hands and mouth and tongue as a tool for direction to find it...no eyes, it was dark.

I couldn't find it.

I kept a slow sensual pace and could not find his fuckin penis
I must be really high

ohhhhhhhhhh myyyyyyyyyy GODDDDDDDDD

that is it!?!?

oh my god

he started moaning and groaning and saying how great my touch felt

holy shit

So now I am going down on him... and i feel like...

OK, I dont how else to describe this for you,
I feel like i am sucking on a lollipop
not a drumstick
not a tootsie roll pop
not a banana
it was some hard candy

it was a dum dum. you know those cheapy little one bite candys on a stick
please tell me you know what im talking about
isnt there a rootbeer flavor?

poor little baby had the smallest penis i have ever encountered!!!!!!!!!!!!!

what the hell do you do when you are there
you are looking staright at it, down there
ON him
you are in the middle of performing the act
the act that you traveled far and wide to the boys dormroom
spotted by college paparotzzi for
you decided it would be worth it

and you are going down on a pinky size when hard penis!
what do you do!?!?!?!?!
there should be some type of warning label for these things!
I just went for it.

Maybe it would get bigger!?
I sucked
and did my thang
and it didnt.

And he moaned and groand.
In the dark,
Me,
Sucking on that pinky finger sized penis.
I literally was rolling my eyes.

I knwo what you are thinking, probably wasnt that small, blah blah blah,or maybe he wasnt hard, or maybe he was a little short guy.

No,no,no.
He was stalky. Not tall but slightly average build.
It was definitely hard.
He was of african american decent.......gotta say it........
It was definitely the size of my pinky finger, I did the test, in my mouth.

Up until now I had had a series of interactions with different color and shaped, sized penises....some very large, long, average, or smaller....but never ever ever like this...

What the hell do you do when you are going down on someone and you literally want to shout out loud oh my god! are you kidding me?! And run away screaming I def. dont want that INSIDE me!?!?!?!?

I was in shock. He gets off and I am already ready to plan my walk of shame outta there. Get me out of this play pen.

He holds me
Very cute
He was cute
Poor guy
I couldnt stop thinking about how I need to............BOLT out of there.......

When I start to hear...
wait
WHAT
is that
NO WAY
whimpering?
is that?
OH MY GOD HE IS CRYING

He starts talking about his ex girlfriend. Now my eyes have rolled so many times in the dark that this is becoming cruel punishment.

He cries
whimpers
I rub his back.I put him to bed, literally tuck him in. (not drunk, havent been high in hours, this is au natural boy with rampant emotions)

Up until that momemnt I have never in my life been so happy to walk on the frosted cold grass freezing in the wee hours of the morning to get to my own bed alone. With peace and quiet.

no more dorms
no more little boys please!


Got an option at pussy? Newly single?
~DONT FUMBLE THE PUSSY~

Man.... what do we learn from.... this story has come out in almost every gathering of women drinking cocktails when size comes up....and I always always win! I sucked the smallest pinky penis ever! That in itself is worth it. No one ever believes me when I raise my pinky finger like Dr.Evil...and I say I swear to god. You dont even wanna know the whole story.It happened to me.

He ended up singing that song in the talent show weeks later.
I always was sweet to him.
He ended up getting back together with his girlfriend.

Not necessairly a pussy funble but this story...experience... is a noteworthy one.

Yes,I man handled the smallest dick ever
Yes,the theory its the motion of the ocean may exist so help me god.
Luv for penis of all sizes!

No, please do not talk about your ex when you are trying to get some!
No, do not talk about your ex............... ever!
That what friends are for.

Yes, perhaps I shouldnt have taken a stroll down memory lane to a boys dorm as an upper classmen woman.
Yes, I should have bolted once he started talking about his ex.

No, you should never sing a song impromptu for a girl, unless you are on your knees proposing marriage (and that may make me bolt too!)

Yes, I did do a favor for all mankind by continuing to finish the "job" like a champ once the veil was lifted. It was like I was training for a game of hoops and the opposing team turned the game into ping pong!???

Add injury to insult when cutie here wants to talk all night long and all you wanna do is hookup!?

Baby, don't talk..........




peace&luv
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